Hello dear fellow readers!
If you want me to be honest at this moment I feel hopeless. I know, I know entertaining this emotion is simply so contradictory of my so-called 'better-future project' but you know honestly, it's okay. I think it's okay to back down once in a while, to say that yes I'm human I can feel that sense of incredible hopelessness, that bleakness that seem to envelope me at the moment, that frustration and painful reminder that nothing has been happening to my plans. It's okay, because we are humans. I am a human. It's okay to feel. It's okay to embrace and acknowledge emotions.
But you know in this moment even though I think nothing has been happening, that I think I haven't gotten there, that nothing has been happening, I'm not stopping. Yes, I am wallowing in this negative emotion but not to stop me from pursuing my dreams but to re-think of my strategy.
While thinking about how I allowed myself to feel, it reminded me of how I felt when I climbed the mountain last month. During my climb, despite of how much I wanted to reach the destination in hurry I felt that need to stop. And you know it's fine. I thought I don't need to reach the top in a hurry. It will take time but I'll reach it if I just continue. So yes I allowed myself to take a rest, to relax, and allow myself to recuperate for a minute. But I did not stop. I continued until I got to the top.
And at this moment, this is what I am doing. There's no way I am backing down. I'm taking a lungful of air for a moment but I'll proceed.